Loving You Or Maybe Not
by sakimidare
Summary: Here I was, minding my own business and being awesome,when suddenly Al came waltzing in to literally blow my world to pieces.Thanks,Al,but no thanks.  College AU.Gil 1st Person POV. one-sided AmeRus, RoPru. 'Cos the Bunny Pair needs more love, dammit!
1. Not Loving You

**A/N: No..hiatus still not over...*sighs***

**Not much action in the first chapter. Just fail attempts at humour and setting the stage.**

**Gilbert First Person View, so double fail. **

**Also, don't worry. All those things about Vanechka? Gil doesn't mean it. He's just in denial, that's all.**

**And if Gil sounds a little... less perverted, please bear with it.**

**Overuse of the word 'awesome' and – at times – 'hero' and 'burger' and 'MacDonald's' and 'superman' and 'star wars'. And maybe 'kolkol'.**

**Also, Fail title is Fail *goes off to sulk in the corner***

**Date: 26th December, 2010**

**(Not) Loving You**

I scooted to the far end of the couch, throwing a smirk in the Vodka guzzling mor – er, I mean Ivan's direction.

OK. You know what? Screw this.

_**Un**_awesome.

Why the hell did Alfred have to invite Ivan over?

Oh..that's right. Ivan took him in when he got kicked out of his and his girl friend's shared apartment and helped him win it back. The apartment, I mean, not her heart. Like Hell if the bear knows anything about Love and hearts and crap. Not that I do, either. Nope, I totally don't write the Advice Column in the School Mag under the name of Sonata. Really. I swear.

You. Did. **Not**. Hear. That! Got it? Good.

Come to think of it, Alfred seems to get kicked out of apartments a shit load of was basically how we met, too. Alfred got into trouble with his cousin, Arthur, and got kicked out of their apartment ( which was actually Arthur's, not to mention Alfred never paid the bills for anything, but still. )

So Francis and I used to share this place back in those days ( give me a break guys. We were not a couple, regardless of all those rumours. Just short of money. And **if** Francis tried to rap – grope me in my sleep a few times – or more like a few billion times – that's none of your business, since the Awesome me took care of myself pretty well.) and Francis , of course, when he saw Alfred, offered to bring him home. And I shouldn't wonder, he has a nice ass. N-not that I was looking or something. Francis pointed that out to me. Because obviously I am so **not** gay. Never been. Anyway, we got along pretty well too, until he decided to move in with Scarlett.(1)

Anyway, moving on.

Adjdfjkghdfj I can't even **believe** Ivan actually had the _audacity_ to _ruffle_ _my_ _awesome_ _hair_ in a most _un_awesome way just now dammit **damn** **you** **retarded** **unawesome** **utter cu – I mean creepy – Idiot**!

How did I manage to get myself in this mess?

( And it was so totally not any of my awesome faults! Dammit shut up voice in my head that sounds a lot like Westen! It was **not**!)

Point is, I am way too awesome for this shit to happen to the Awesome me!

I blame Al. At first I thought he was a pretty awesome kid ...not nearly as awesome as the Awesome me, of course..kesesese...but still pretty awesome for normal kids, you know. But now, not so much.

**oOo**

_**5 Weeks Ago**_

"_Scheisse_..." I groaned in my sleep.

My cell was ringing. And damn unawesomely loud it was, too. Fuck you, whoever's calling.

_Was ist olles?_ It was just... a glance at the bedside clock proved that I wasn't too far off in my surmise... 2 in the fucking morning?

So I did the only thing I could.

I slapped a pillow over my head to block out the unawesome noise and went back to sleep. Or at least, tried to.

" _...pokazhi pokazhi pokazhi pokazhi.._

_pokazhi pokazhi pokazhi mne lyubov..."_

Shut _UP_!

I never dreamt in my wildest dreams that it would be possible for me to hate Rammstein. Or t.A.t.U. And they are totally awesome so shut your trap.

The cell went silent. I mentally cheered. The unawesome thing better stay that way if it doesn't want to be thrown out of my second floor window ( or maybe not. I would have to get up and open that window if I didn't want to pay for that glass...thrice in a month. And it was a SmartPhone and it had cost me a lot so maybe I should reconsider its Death Sentence to simply some glaring at it like it was going to explode from the sheer intensity of the glare?..)

So while I was musing all these totally important and awesome thoughts, the phone remained blissfully silent. I had just come to the part where I grunt a sleepy 'Unawesome brat' at it and turn around and go back to sleep when it began to ring.

Again.

Loudly.

At 2 in the morning.

Maybe I shouldn't have shown it the mercy. The beast doesn't seem to deserve it.

After ignoring the phone for a good half an hour, I let out a frustrated sigh. Fuck this unawesome shit...

"_Was ist olles?_ _Was ist das, arscheloch?_ _Wie spat ist es du Idiot?" _a very pissed off and sleep deprived German barked into the cell.

I hoped to God this wasn't a drunk off their ass Francis or Arthur or Antonio calling me up …._again_.

"_Ich schwore, _if this is Francis or Arthur or Antonio, I will personally make sure that you will die a very slow and painful dea - "

"Whoa Bro cool off!"

My eyes twitched.

So Alfred had finally decided to join in the League of "Get Drunk Off Your Head At Three In The Morning And Call Gilbert Up Depriving Him of His Sleep Just For The Heck Of It"?

He. Was. So. **DEAD.**

After ten minutes of continuous onslaught of German, American, French and Spanish (2) words that I guareantee you will never find in any dictionary and an epic quadri-lingual rant, I paused for air.

"Hahahah Man, you sure as hell are good – hic – at this!"

And was that Francis asking him to turn off the lights in the background?

And WAS that Arthur who was shouting at Francis now something along the lines of "bloody frog I am going to be sore the rest of my life"?

Oh _Mein_ _Gott_!  
I did not even wish to know.

"F-f-fuck you guys, for raping my ears!" I practically cried as I hung up, not wanting any more psychological trauma than I had already experienced.

After that, I quickly sent off a text to Erzsbeta informing her of the new – developments, and went back to sleep, smirking all the while. .

The awesome me will get back at those three for the days I'll surely have to spend in therapy after that.

Just for extra precautions, I switched the cell off. If Westen decided to call me ( which was why I kept it open at night in the first place. That, and that I forget to switch it off anyway since my head is so full of other awesome thoughts. )

from back home, he would have to wait. My Awesome Sleep came first.

**This is a Page Break for Next Morning, da!**

The next morning, I opened my door to get the newspaper and five feet ten of still drunk hyper blond annoying American crashed into me. Literally.

"Oooof...man, unawesome." I grumbled, saved due to the fact that my reflexes are – much like me – very awesome and hence jumping back and letting the other fall to the ground.

What? Even a five year old kid knows better than to lean against a door that has even a 0.00001 per cent chance of being opened.

Although considering this _was_ Alfred, who was not really famed as the sharpest tool in the shed – so to say – and frankly I kind of doubt that he has the mental competence of said five year old kid, I guess he _could_ be kind of excused...

..whatever. It was too early for this kind of unawesome shit, so I growled.

I mean, it was not really anything new for me. Unfortuantely.

I have lost count of how many times Anotnio or Francis or Arthur had shown up at my door completely smashed. Hell, I have lost count of how many times I myself have shown up at West's door back in Berlin completely smashed.

Except that I wasn't smashed.

No, really.

Well, not completely, anyway. And you are definitely unawesome for thinking so.

Besides, my Awesome more than makes up for any time I might or might not have shown up smashed at anyone's door, so shut your cake hole, _ja_?

Alfred looked at me, giving me his best puppy eyes. I melted a little inside...not that I would admit it to anyone.

"IlikeIvan" he said so fast that I didn't even get it completely. I mean, seriously. Al on a roll is like that Swede Teach in our school – simply unintelligible.

And anyway, that was just out of context. What did his liking Ivan have to do with anything?

More importantly, what did it have to do with Alfred showing up at my door obviously **wasted** from his breath that **reeked** of vodka and more possibly than not drunk off his ass and by the state of his clothes and my porch which had **at** **least** **three** empty glass bottles littered around and excuse me but **EW**! **Unawesome** and not only because it was Moskovskaya – **wait**!

_Wait wait wait wait **WAIT**!_

He drank three bottles of vodka?

Freaking **vodka**?

This, my dear friends, was _not_ awesome.

In fact this was fucking freaking **ununununUNawesome** oh my God what should I do and oh dear God is that _**vomit**_ on my porch?

No, I was **not** spazzing out and about to go into a panic attack. Absolutely not. Whatever made you think that?

OK I was but _EW_! Dude! And did Al just **throw** **up** on my **favourite** chick slippers ( totally manly and awesome, so fuck _**off**_. )

"Fucking unawesome, dude." I said, feeling a strange compulsion to rush to the bathroom and throw up myself, but also rooted to the spot with a scary impulse to don my chick-printed apron ( also awesome and manly) and start cleaning (and maybe sterilising) the porch (and my cute – err, awesome – chick slippers) then and there.

Damn, this has to be what West feels like.

Actually, I never cleaned back home, since that was unawesome and I, of course, was anything but. But ever since I moved in with Francis, I realised that _maybe_ cleaning was not _that_ unawesome, after all. (2)

Anyway, what Al said started becoming clear.

" I like Ivan but he doesn't like me what do Ido oh God my bum hurts damn you Francis ("W-A-Y too much information, dude!" I protested ) oh no oh no I just want to – Censored – Ivan ("B-A-D mental Images !") and oh God Arthur I hate you my neck is gonna bruise ( "FOR **GOTT'S** SAKE DUDE SHUT **UP**! YOU'RE GIVING ME **MENTAL** **TRAUMA**!" ) And oh Ivan I - "

It was worse than listening to him after having made him watch a marathon of Japanese horror movies for a **week **for God's sake!

So to shut him up, I said, " Kesesese Al, you are a pretty awesome kid, and I will help you since I am just that awesome ( which of course everyone already knows so I didn't need to really point it out but I felt like so I did anyway and it shouldn't matter 'cos I am awesome) , but only if you shut up first."

Yeah, it was to just to shut him up. Not because he looked so darn much like a kicked puppy.

Al immediately brightened up, making the suspicion that he had been only faking it all along rear its head in my sromach.

I will admit it. Maybe the Awesome Me had really been taken for a ride.

B-but only becauseI can't resist cute things like fluffy chickens and puppy eyes.

And thats only because I am just too awesome, so shut it.

Yeah, thats it...

And so began my not so slow spiral into Doom

**A/N:Yay! I started another multi-chapter /is shot/**

**Somehow I think he's not really as full of himself as he seems to be. He just acts that way 'cos it protects him from the outside world.**

**Also...**

**THE AMERICAN CIVIL WAR HELL YEAH! Russia was one of the first to acknowledge** **the Union. Scarlett is the representation of the Confederates. Thats why I mentioned Al getting his apartment back. Named after Scarlett O'Hara from Gone With the Wind.**

**Prussia was a military state, after all. And his Wiki Page said something about his Real Nature being that of a diligent and punctual soldier that got shrouded by his natural rebelliousness. So, I think that while there were people to clean up after him, he would deliberately make messes, but if he is forced to leave alone, or with someone who is also very messy, he would get into "Clean and Organise and Discipline" Mode.**

**What else...that time Gil and Fran took Al in was the American War of Revolution, if you can't tell.**

**Excuse me for messing around with History, but having far too much fun to stop /is bricked/**

**NOT SO SUBTLE BRIBE: Review, and I will return the favour if you have a story in a fandom I know.**


	2. Not Loving You II

**A/N: Nope..still on Hiatus ;D**

**Filler chapter yay /bricked up alive/**

**And this is a continuation of Gil's flashback from last chapter, and the next one will be too, and so on until I type "END OF FLASHBACK – THIS IS NOW IN AL'S HOUSE" in bold underlined font.**

**Also, this will probably not be more than five or so chapters -.-;;; 'Cos I .**

**Date : 26th Dec, Edited and Completed: 3rd January**

**EDIT : 27th January, 2010.**

**On a Hiatus from my Hiatus ^^:: (that made sense in my mind!)**

**On a random note, I am Prussia, Canada and Germany all in one as per that profile quiz. Congratulate me for being MPD?**

***looks at last chapter word count and whistles* Holy Flying Cow! 2K+? *grins and nods satisfiedly***

**Don't get used to it, guys..and here's a crappy chapter to show you why... -.-;;;**

***notices the number of reviews* I'm gonna be totally cliché here and tell you all that I love you, 'cos thats the truth *glomps everyone and hands over cookies* but now I am nervous since this is kinda stupid *cries in corner***

**If I forgot to return anyone's reviews, PM me and tell me so. I lost track -.-;;**

**Sorry about this insanely long note *facewall***

**Loving You...Or Maybe Not**

**Zwei**

I peered into the corridor, and failing to notice the cornflower yellow tuft of hair, streaked down the hallway.

Another hallway! Fuckin' ja, I was only two hallways down from my class.

I mentally cheered as I streaked down another hallway without being noticed.

Or at least attempted to.

"Gilly! Yo, dude!" A certain obsecenly cheerful "Come and Strangle Me for Being an Annoying Little Squirt" blond _arscheloch_ greeted – or more aptly, yelled.

I turned in slow motion, trying to reason with myself so I didn't end up killing him.

_There are witnesses here._ _Trap him on the way home or something._

I know...that sounded so totally _awesome_, kesesese~ Of course thats a given considering that I am the one saying it. Who says I am not practical? Stick that, _Westen_.

Seriously, though.

Of all the people to spot me, of _course_ it had to be _him_.

Gott, what unawesome thing did I do to land me in this definitely not awesome shit?

Oh...wait. _Everything _I do is awesome, since its the awesome me doing it, after all. If something isn't awesome enough, my awesome makes it awesome so maybe I should rephrase that question?

What awesome did I not do to deserve this unawesome shit?

While I was thus doing a(n awesome) mental check list of what bitchy Karma could have landed in such an unawesome situation, Alfred was rambling on about...something.

Give me a break, guys. Excuse me for not noticing something while I was zoning out – awesomely so, if I may add, and since I am awesome, I of course may.

Anyway, I was done spacing out (and had failed to understand what Karma had bitch-slapped me like this) and I thought I heard my name in the middle of Alfred's Oscar or some such shit worthy rant, so I went "Whoa whoa, I know I am awesome, and so is my name,but ya don't have to say it all the time, ya know. Because though me spacing out wasn't all that unawesome – nothing I do is or ever can be – its still a bit less awesome than my usual level (which, of course, was Infinity). That, and the fact that Al could pack a mean punch.

Both of them stared at me some, and me, The Clueless Idi – Awesome , I mean – became aware of the fact, belatedly, that Ivan had been standing there with us the whole time.

Immediately my "Preserve the Awesome Gilbert Beillschimdt " senses kicked in and I stammered a hasty "See ya later – stay awesome" over my shoulder to Al (Not Ivan, because he was unawesome and hence not worthy of it) and ran back – walked to my homeroom.

No, I did not run back.

I merely walked quickly.

Ok very quickly. But hey, this was Ivan freakin' Braginski we are talking about.

Six feet tall – check.

Built like a wall – check

On the Ice Hockey (and figure skating – but I will overlook that for now) team – check

Bipolar – check.

And, above all, enjoys making a certain awesome silverette's life hell for him – a big, fat red CHECK.

All in caps, please.

I heaved a huge sigh as I entered my Homeroom. I was late, but seeing as how I always am, Miss Katyusha Arlovskaya (that's our teach) let me in with just a frown. Resisting the compulsion to whistle at her rack (which was Immense.), I walked in.

And all of five minutes later, Ivan and Al walked in after me.

Oh yeah.

I forgot that they were in the same Homeroom as me.

Talk about weak memories.

Cue sheepish (but still awesome) grin.

Unfortunately, Francis and 'Tonio had a different homeroom so I had no one I could pretend to be my friend. And that's not a problem with me, since I like being alone anyway.

So I did the unthinkable – I snatched a book from my backpack and started studying.

Ok, just pretending to. Shut up!

"Psssst, Gil.."

That's what I was afraid of. I mean, really? Hewas** three **rowsbehindand** two **rowsawayfromme** for God's sake!**

"Hey, dude!"

And what he considered a whisper was anything but. It sounded more like a bullhorn. Miss Arlovskaya looked up and shot a glance at Al, but didn't say anything, because that's the way she was. She's got a big ra – heart. Yeah, thats it. A big heart.

"Gil!"

Go away, Al, I am not interested in talking to you...

"GIL!"

Ignoring you, man...

**Bomp!**

I glared at the paper ball that had hit me bang on the back of my awesome head, hoping it would spontaneously combust from the sheer intensity of the glare.

Al now forgot to lower his voice in excitement. Which resulted to him discreetly whispering (yelling) to half the classroom "READ IT! READ IT!" because thats just his normal voice.

I swear he took away his twin, Matthew's lung power in the womb or something.

Seeing that I was receiving rather odd glances from my classmates (and Miss Arlovskaya) I opened it. And I was **not** pouting.

**Our "Come Pass Me Notes Al, Since I Was Only (Pretending To Be, But He Doesn't Know That!) Studying" Session:**

_Gil,_

_Yo dude! I was calling to ya, ya know? I guess ya don't or you'd have answered LOL._

–_Always The Hero, _

_Al._

_Al,_

_Well, I certainly do now. Did you have to hit me? D:_

_Stay Awesome,_

_Gilbert _

_Gil,_

_Soooo...you remember?_

– _Always The Hero,_

_Al._

_Al,_

_Remember what?_

– _Stay Awesome,_

_Gilbert._

This was where Al lost all his common sense (like he had some before? Tough Luck. ) and jumped up, screaming "WHAT WAS THAT YOU NEEDED TO TELL IVAN?"

The whole class, including our teach, looked over at the two of us. I stared at him with a horrified "WTF Dude Seriously No Way In Hell Did You Just Do That Tell Me You Did NOT!" expression on my face while Braginsky (the huge moron) stared at me in an "Oh Really I Am So Going To Break Every Bone In Your Body And Cheerfully Make Them Mallets for Croquette" manner .

Don't even ask me how I know about Croquette.

I have **not** read Alice In Wonderland a total of eighteen times, thank you very much.

And I was **not** pouting again.

And I was **not** blushing like a pubescent hormonal Schoolgirl. Nope.

And the whole class were **not** whispering among themselves that I was ..going to finally confess or some such shit and Elizabeta – damn you, that ingrate – was **not** taking pictures of Braginsky and Al and me - how on Earth did she get that Camera inside? That's supposed to be banned on campus – and Miss Arlovskaya was **not** giggling at us and **Goddammit** this is **not** **happening** its just a nightmare let me wake up from it –

- I crashed to the floor with a thud. Damn me and my habit of dozing off in classes. And thank God, the whole Passing Notes fiasco was just what I had prayed for it to be – a nightmare.

Al gave me a pissed off look before passing me a note. "Here it comes," I thought and opened it.

**The Passing Notes Session Which Is NOT Another Nightmare:**

_Gil,_

_You were sleeping all the time?_

_:X – Always The Hero, AL!_

_Alfred,_

_No, just some moments ago. _

_:D – Stay Awesome, Gilbert. _

_Gil,_

_Haha dude very funny. Wait for us after the class will ya?_

_Always The Hero, AL!_

_Alfred,_

_I can't I have to hurry I have a date._

_C: – Stay Awesome, Gilbert._

_Gil,_

_But I needs ya!_

_D : – Always The Hero, AL!_

_Alfred,_

_Noooooo._

_Gilbert_

_Gil,_

_Yessssssssss_

– _Al_

_Alfred,_

_No can do_

_Gilbert_

Which is why I hate God. If the Big Guy Up There had just let me ignore Al and given him some common sense, I wouldn't have been in this mess right now.

**A/N: Next chapter, the shit really hits the fan. I'm sorry I didn't include that bit this chapter, but I can't type anymore D: Really sorry for the crappy quality, but my Selections start tomorrow!**

**And yeah, there was a ( not so ) subtle premonition somewhere in here. **

**Also I know texting is easier than passing notes, but Passing Notes is more fun! And I am aware that nobody writes their own names in the notes in case it gets intercepted, but I am too tired (lazy) for that right now. /shot/**

**Gilbo says to stay awesome ^_^**


	3. Not Loving You III

**Loving You or Maybe Not**

This was bad.

Let me sketch out the situation for you.

Al, Ivan and I were in the same room. With Al jabbing me in the side and Braginsky looking at me like I was a rabbit and he was a wolf about to beat the shit out of me.

Not awesome at all.

"Dammit Al, why can't _you_ say it?" I grumbled in a low voice.

"You said you'd help me!" he shot back, in what might have been meant to be a low voice, but I don't think his voice is made to go any lower than "Loud".

We were thus peachily arguing in low (and not so low) voices, completely ignoring the other person in the room.

That is, until he spoke up.

"I know what you are trying to tell me, da."

We stopped midway between our "conversation" and stared at him. Well, I stared at him. Al said something humanly nondecipherable along the lines if "sghatzahajagasmawcfjaea."

"I think he's having a panic attack." I muttered, awestruck at Al's ability of speaking fish, for what else could that be?

I think Ivan was going to say something in reply – he had opened his mouth – but then the whole world turned upside down as somebody hit my head. As in, hard!

"What the fuck?" I spluttered, facing a very angry Matthew.

"You. Don't fucking stand me up to fucking hang out with my freaking brother!" Mattie hissed, probably deeply in his Hockey-Mode, because otherwise he would never have uttered the F-word.

Oh shit. I had forgotten that Fran, Mattie, Toni and I were meeting up today.

"I didn't – " I tried to protest, but it was lost as Mattie started to physically drag me out of the room.

"Later, guys."

o0o

I massaged my awesome neck – which was throbbing after Mattie had tried to kill me – as Mattie apologized profusely.

"I'm so sorry, Gil, I – "

"Its alright." I muttered. "I forgive you because you are pretty awesome. And my best friend."

"Th-thanks Gil." Mattie muttered back, looking incredibly guilty, "Are you sure you don't need to go to the nurse…?"

"I'm too awesome to go to the Nurse!" I protested, making Fran laugh.

I glared at him. "Whats so funny?""

"You." He snickered, completely disregarding my feelings.

I was about to tell him to shut his mouth before Awesome shut it for him, but Tonio (who had been smiling at thin air this whole time) interjected.

"Hey, what about the band?"

"What band?" I said, feeling a bit stupid – and Gott, was that unawesome!

All three gave me a blank stare. "You know? The one you talked us into forming?"

Oh that. We were serious about it?  
"Wait a minute guys. We were serious?"

"…."

"…."

"GET YOUR ASS INTO GEAR!"

I jumped at Mattie's yell, Fran flinched and Tonio… well, he continued to smile vacantly.

"So! Decide who's going to play what?" I said excitedly – I've always loved music, and it was awesome they had taken the idea seriously. I didn't expect them to because no body ever seems to take me seriously, which is pretty unawesome if you ask me. And I'm awesome, so you have to ask me.

"You said you wanted to play Lead guitar." Mattie whispered, subsiding into his usual wallflower ways once more. "Fran is playing Bass guitar, I'm on the keyboard."

"And Tonio?" I asked. "Drums?" I somehow couldn't visualize Tonio playing drums. Always seemed more of a guitar guy.

"Rhythm Guitar." Mattie corrected me.

"Wait. Then who's playing drums?"

"Well, we asked Arthur - he already is in a band." Francis mused.

"_You_ asked Arthur? **How**? I mean.. aren't you two supposed to be at loggerheads?" I asked incredulously, though after hearing them over Al's call the first night, I should really have known better.

Francis smirked and replied with a "Not before Mattie, _mon cher_." making Mattie flush. We all made a careful rule never to say anything that might embarrass him. He was like our little bro. Like West, but a lot cuter and less scary – well, at least until he went into his infamous Hockey Mode anyway.

I missed West.

"It hasn't been decided." Mattie muttered to divert the conversation. "We were thinking of holding an audition…"

"Oui. So when will it be convenient for you?"

"Errr… I don't think the awesome me will be needed." I said, because I had already decided to skip school for the next week or so, just to make sure I don't get caught in between AL and Ivan. If Ivan already knew, I was pretty sure Al could deal with him, what with his super human strength (he had wrenched off my jammed locker door for me once). I wanted to live a bit (or a lot) longer.

"Well, it would be nice if we were all there.." Mattie reasoned.

"I feel kinda ill. Not very awesome." I said, trying to cover myself. "I might not come to school for the next week or so."

Francis gave me a sharp look. He can be pretty perceptive at times.

Leaning over and touching my forehead, he nodded thoughtfully. "He _does_ feel a bit hot. Take a little rest. Its probably just the heat waves."

I sometimes wish I could be as clever as him. Francis has a way of knowing exactly what to say. He just prevented Mattie from having a panic attack and from me being interrogated. I, on the other hand, tend to say the wrong things almost every time, no matter how awesome I am. Like with Rodia….

Note to self: Self reflection brings back unawesome memories.

"Alright, then you should probably be going home." Mattie muttered, still looking a bit worried, before brightening. "I'll get you some soup tomorrow?"

"Get me your awesome pancakes." I said, "kesesese"-ing.

Mattie's pancakes were awesome, and with maple syrup they were just heavenly. Almost as good as West's wursts and Francis' crepes. Which were the only things which I will acknowledge to be almost as awesome as me, so you know how awesome they were.

o0o

Turning down Francis' offer to drop me had been a big mistake.

As I was walking home ( because my bus was freaking fifteen minutes late and I was too awesome to wait!) Iran into a soft wall.

Which was a chest.

Which belonged to none other than Ivan Braginsky.

I hoped to God he didn't know about my promise to help Al get him to like him, because he might blow up . Ivan was known to be prone to violent overreactions.

I couldn't help but gulp and take a step backwards just as he took one forward.

"I know what you were trying to tell me~"

"You do?" I asked, succeeding in not mumbling and meeting his gaze. I was awesome, and not afraid of anything – even if the thing happened to be a six feet tall super strong Russian who could probably reduce me to dust with a single punch.

If possible, his smile grew wider as he nodded enthusiastically.

"Da! Gilbert likes me, da?"

**A/N: So… sorry this is so late. I-I've been having personal problems. I really am sorry! Hopefully I'll become a bit regular with this, but don't count on it. **

**Whom do you want Russia to end up with?**

**I had originally planned for RoPru, but I've been reading a lot of awesome RusAme and PruCan fics and have grown to like both the pairings quite well OTL...do you want it to be RusAme or RoPru?**

**AH, and thank you for the reviews^^**

**Anonymous review reply: ****Celeste Marie****: I'd never give up spamming you guys with my crap, don't worry! ^o^ **

**AsaKiku Fan:**** I'm so sorry there isn't going to be any AsaKiku! And thank you for giving it a try even though not one of the pairings are ones you like^^**

**Cookies and mocha cuteness to everyone who read, reviewed, alerted and favourited. Thank you all^^ And sorry for the H-U-G-E gap! I will try to not be late again..but I hope you all understand that I'm going through hard times. **

**EPIC RANT YOU DON'T NEED TO READ: My English Literature teacher gave me a 60% on the test since I "Made my own answers." The question was "Analyse the subject of the story as YOU INTERPRET IT!" We were supposed to freaking interpret it IN OUR OWN WAY! Not write what we mugged up! That's sick!**

**Anyway, thus, I've slipped from Section C (which is for people of 95% and above) to Section B (for people of 80% to 95%) and my parents are throwing shit fits about it. And now I'm not so sure I want to go back.. I mean, **_**really**_**? If **_**this**_** is what is smart, I'm not sure I want to be counted as one of them. Basically, I'm having a little idealistic crisis OTL.**

**Ahahaha well I hope nobody read the last part. It somehow makes me lighter to say it out loud. Because nobody seems to understand where I'm coming from here.**


	4. Not Loving You IV

**A/N: Here, have another super-fast update for making you wait so long.**

**Loving You or Maybe Not**

_I couldn't help but gulp and take a step backwards just as he took one forward. _

"_I know what you were trying to tell me~"_

"_You do?" I asked, succeeding in not mumbling and meeting his gaze. I was awesome, and not afraid of anything – even if the thing happened to be a six feet tall super strong Russian who could probably reduce me to dust with a single punch._

_If possible, his smile grew wider as he nodded enthusiastically._

"_Da! Gilbert likes me, da?"_

Do you really blame me if I did a double take and ran after this?

Don't laugh! Don't you dare! I have a trauma regarding this!

When I was 12, Lizzie, my best friend, caught on that I liked her. I couldn't sit up without hurting like hell all over for around a month after that.

Even awesome has its limits. After Lizzie and Rodia, anyone would run on hearing a six feet tall football player declare that he knew you loved him. Even if he was wrong. Even if they were as awesome as me.

Anyway, I basically turned around and walked at the maximum speed I could, because my awesome would never allow me to run. Maybe I should have stayed to explain everything to him, but I couldn't. Not only did I want to live for a long time and hence wanted to escape another Lizzie style beating Ivan version, but also I … this just reminded me too much of Rodia.

I know you must all be thinking "What the Hell is this with this Rodia chick?" To help you, a brief (and for me very painful) flashback:

Rodia was this absolutely beautiful brunette I liked back home when I was 14. I used to follow her home every day in secret. Then one day she turned around, and, just like Ivan, said: "I know what you want. You like me, don't you?"

To cut long story short, we went out, she told me she loved me too and would never leave me. Then one day she went away without a word to me. Yeah. That's all. That's [i]really[/i] all that there was to it.

That was also the reason I got sent to USA on my own. Change of scenery and all that shit. [i]Mutti[/i] just refused to accept the fact that I was not moping around and I locked myself in my room because that's what all the Awesome people do! She can be such a pain!

Ahem, anyway, coming back to the matter at hand, although I will admit that it might have been a bit unawesome, it was definitely not my fault!

I ran all the way home – which was a shitty idea, by the way. I feel like I have been ran over by a truck now - just in time to catch Fran's call.

"Yeah?" I mumbled, still panting.

"Have you been up to some..vigorous activities, _mon cher_?" Fran asked, and I swore I could hear the smirk in his voice.

"Go to Hell." I told him.

"I am afraid I will have to turn you down." Francis laughed, not minding me in the least, which was irritating because I wanted him to mind me. "Anyway, I am calling because of the auditions. You remember, _oui_?"

"_Oui._" I mimicked him in my worst possible French accent, just to piss him off.

He ignored me. Unawesome idiot.

"Well, good news~ there is no longer any need for them." His voice sparkled over the phone.

…What? It _did_ sparkle….

"We are not going to make a band after all?" I muttered, a bit put off. Seriously, people need to think before playing around with my awesome feelings…

"Non non. We already have a drummer, oui?"

I swear my neighbours were going to kick me out of my own flat if I kept on shouting like this.

"..Gil, I think you just put my left ear forever out of action.." came Fran's voice. Smartass.

I think I might have put my awesome voice out of commission for a bit, though….

"So, who's he?" I asked, a bit apprehensive. Not everyone could stand my awesome. Most people would probably quit pretty soon if they had to work with a secret snark like Mattie, a clueless evil prankster like Tonio, a smartass perv like Fran, and all around blinding awesome like me. I totally get it, too.

"Come and see. We are practicing at Mattie's home." And he hung up! I hate it when somebody hangs up on me.

o0o

When I finally got to Fran's home half an hour had already passed. Mattie was waiting outside for me, tapping his feet impatiently like a mother hen. Not that I would ever say that to his face. He might go off into his Hockey mode and beat the shit out of me. Its happened before. And unfortunately, more than once.

Before I could as much as open my mouth, he dragged me in the garage. Which had apparently been improvised for us.

"Mom wouldn't let us practice inside." He mumbled. "Says I already drive her crazy enough without having all that extra noise."

Now I knew why he was so mad. His mom had confused her with Al again. Which sucked so hard. I never could figure out why anyone would confuse sweet, passive aggressive, mother hen Mattie with hyperactive, loud, exuberant Al.

To take his mind off matters, I started to ask him who our new drummer was, when I caught sight of something – or someone.

"Holy shit what the hell is he doing here!" I screamed, getting in Francis' face and shaking him by the collar.

"I could faintly hear Mattie in the background as Tonio and he dragged me away from Fran.

"Gil, I know you don't like him, but he's a cool person." Mattie told me, frowning.

"_Oui_, he can be a bit eccentric, but he's alright." Francis piped up from behind him.

I looked up at Ivan as his shadow fell on where I was on the floor, having been knocked back by Mattie while he was trying to pull me off of Francis.

"Gilbert is still mad at me about earlier, _da_?" he giggled – yes, he, a six feet tall giant, _giggled_! ...It was kind of cute though – no. What am I thinking? That was just plain creepy!

"Don't be afraid, _da_? Ivan likes Gilbert too."

**A/N: Its going to stay RoPru (As planned originally~)! Yay! –is shot by Meen-Meen and Anna-**

**Oh, and I found out Belarus-chan is a RoPru fangirl –glomps reviewer who will forever be little Bela-chan to her-**

**And I also found out us RoPru fangirls tend to be a bit..cough..violent XDD**

**D-does anybody want to take part in Hetalia RPs? One is about HetaOni, and the format is quite innovative (well, I haven't seen it before, at least.) The other is an AU about Gilbert, a musician who falls in love with a somewhat unstable Russian~ (it may not stay RoPru till the end though. I did it to capture the dynamics.) If anyone is interested, they can check them out at: (take out the spaces please): **http: / www. gaiaonline. com/ forum/ series-related-miscellaneous-role-play/ can-t-play-with-broken-strings-hetalia-rp-open-need-people/t.71929159_1/

http: / www. / forum/ series-related-miscellaneous-role-play/hetalia-hetaoni-semi-lit-o-a/t.72038123_1/

**Cookies and mochi cuteness as usual to everyone who read, reviewed, alerted and favourited. Thank you all^^ **


End file.
